


Equations

by ironyruinedmylife



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Barry continues to be Helpful™, Caitlin is a doctor, Cisco is the abuela hartley never had, Gen, Hart isn't healthy, Hartley, Lightsabers are made, Mustafar is mocked, Star Wars - Freeform, Star wars everywhere, and takes no crap, barry is Helpful™, cause they sure as hell aint gonna refilm s1 with my child, cisco is kinky, expecially from Hartley, hartley gets revenge, harts dad is a huge dick, idk guys, its all happening here, kind of a filler in fic, lemme know what pairings you want, literally just after, my one true love, nothing can convince me otherwise, nothing is sacred here, post Flash Back, rick-roll, right now its focusing on building friendships, this could turn into some shippy stuff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-30
Updated: 2016-04-01
Packaged: 2018-05-30 03:53:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6407707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ironyruinedmylife/pseuds/ironyruinedmylife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or some stories about what happened after Barry left the Team to go Back To The Future (I'm so sorry) and how exactly Hartley fits in. This episode: Hartley still tells TF about Dr Wells shadiness, Caitlin isn't amused, Cisco drops an F-Bomb and everyone is thirsty for Prequels Obi-Wan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What Comes Next?

Cisco, Caitlin and Dr Wells watched the security feed. They hadn’t moved in the last ten minutes since Cisco had walked back in and immediately turned on the monitors. Dr Wells had that funny look on his face where none of them could really tell what he was thinking about (Murder, usually) and didn’t _really_ want to ask, Caitlin was frowning, which meant that something was about to change (The last time she’d frowned like this Barry had received a new wardrobe) and Cisco was clenching his jaw.  
  
That usually meant: Oh _f_ _uck_ , somethings not right here.  
  
No one spoke.  
  
On the screen, Hartley Rathaway sat in his cell, various pieces of his gloves around him, mumbling in an odd hybrid of Latin, Spanish, French and Italian while threading some wires together. They’d given him no equipment. He’d already deconstructed the weapons and was now happily putting them back together, better than before.  
  
“Why _did_ you fire him?” Caitlin asked calmly. Dr Wells blinked  
  
“Excuse me?”  
  
“Why did you fire him? He’s _brilliant_ , everyone knew that. And we needed him, the Accelerator would have been better if he was there.”  
  
Cisco swallowed and began to scoot his chair backward a little as Caitlin’s face morphed from Uh Oh Frown™ to Scary Smile™. Dr Wells blinked  
  
“His personality was becoming an issue in the work environment.” He replied coolly. Caitlin was just about to reply when they heard a small tapping sound and looked up to see Hartley throwing bits of tech at the camera  
  
“That is _bullshit_ , Harrison.” He called. Cisco blinked  
  
“I thought that the hearing aids-“  
  
“The reason I have tinnitus is because my hearing was amplified to the point where I can hear _everything_ for _miles_. It's rather frustrating, however, back to your point, Dr Snow, its _bullshit_. I found out the accelerator would blow and he fired me and told me to keep my mouth shut or he’d ruin my career. Of course he did anyway but y’know…” He trailed off, frowning down at a small bolt. Caitlin smiled widely at a now rather pale Dr Wells  
  
“That true?” She asked. Dr Wells didn’t say anything, Hartley called out in some latin and Caitlin stood up and walked out, throwing her pen down onto the desk, making Dr Wells flinch. Cisco grit his teeth  
  
“Fuck you, man. We gave you _everything_ , _he_ gave you everything, and _this_? This fuckery is what you give us?” He growled “Hartley hold on, we can work on those back at my flat.”  
  
“Cisco, I don’t think-“  
  
“You don’t get to make any more decisions until you make it up to us. _All_ of us.” He added pointedly, glancing at Hartley who was now staring at the camera, wide eyed  
  
“ _Shit_ , Harrison, you just got checkmated by an amateur.” He snickered. Cisco shot one last glare at Harrison, who let his head fall into his hands, only looking up again when he was sure Cisco was far enough away for him to speak  
  
“I will _ruin_ you for this, Hartley.” He growled. Hartley raised an eyebrow  
  
“My dear, you already did.” He replied sadly, “Your game has only just begun, Thawne.”  
  
Harrison blinked. Hartley smiled widely at the camera, eyes glinting behind his glasses. “How did you-”  
  
“Because I’m _clever_ , Harrison. But I don't matter, just you wait 'til _Barry_ figures it out.” He laughed at that, and it was all Eobard could do not to run down and snap his neck, but as long as Cisco and Caitlin were suspicious, as long as they tolerated Hartley, he couldn’t touch him. And that stung like a bitch. Harrison watched as Cisco let Hartley out of the cell, smiling awkwardly at him  
  
“Hey, so um, I’m sorry,” He mumbled. Hartley shrugged, beginning to gather up the half working gloves as he glanced up at his ex-coworker  
  
“I’m sorry too, for, for everything,” He replied, blushing lightly. Cisco smiled then  
  
“You’re kinda cute when you aren’t being bitchy, I guess I’m gonna have to make you watch Star Wars now.” He stated, cackling at the stunned look on Hartley’s face, then frowned as it turned into a smirk.  
  
“Prequels first? I live for Obi-Wan’s everything.” He leered as Cisco blinked, stunned  
  
“You thirsty, lying little shit.” He mumbled. Soon it was Hartley cackling as he walked past Cisco out of the cell, Cisco running to catch up as they walked out. "But y'know, same. Obi-Wan man, _Obi-Wan_."  
  
Silently, Eobard Thawne fumed.


	2. Jedi Fools

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Cisco and Hartley are total screaming nerds, tin foil is everywhere and Barry feels abandoned.

  
Caitlin stood in the entrance of the cortex. She blinked, blinked again, pinched herself and made a mental note not to eat cheese before bed ever, _ever_ again. Because no way in hell could any of this scene be real. Paper was strewn _everywhere_ , crumpled sheets creating both a new carpet and decorative art pieces involving three overflowing trash cans, several sharpies and there were bits of tin foil caught in the monitor screens.   
  
The most surprising thing in the room however was seeing Cisco and Hartley Rathaway, who had only been released from his cell to room with Cisco two weeks ago, dancing along the tabletops, battling fiercely with makeshift coloured swords? Lightsabers? Yep, Cisco was yelling something about his ‘new empire’ and Hartley was making the ‘ _Vwoom_ , _vwoom_ ’ noises as they chased each other.   
  
“You’ll never win, Sith!” Hartley yelled. Cisco cackled and swiped at his opponent with a ‘lightsaber’ made mostly out of tin foil, stick tape and kitchen paper rolls coloured in red  
  
“Move aside, Jedi scum!” He replied, darting forwards, only for Hartley to essentially drop kick him off the desk, and Caitlin breathed a sharp sigh of relief when she noticed that both of them were only wearing fuzzy socks, not shoes. God knows what Hartley’s Emo Boots™ (Cisco, it was _all_ Cisco) would have done to poor Cisco’s behind if he’d been wearing them. Cisco glared at him and dramatically chucked his mock sabre aside  
  
“You were my brother, Anakin! I _loved_ you!” Hartley fell to his knees on the desk, throwing an arm over his eyes as Cisco rolled over and did the same  
  
“ _I hate you!_ ” He yelled, then started making fizzing noises and screeching as he rose slowly, leaving Hartley unaware of his opponent (he was still spread eagle on the desk) who slowly started making odd sighing noises. Hartley looked up as Cisco pounced  
  
“Give in, Jedi fool!” “Darth Vader’ ordered, mercilessly tickling his now shrieking enemy. Hartley squirmed away  
  
“F- _Fuck_ , yo-” he broke into helpless giggles before laying down again and sighing deeply “Luke must go on without me, it is the Will Of The Force, trademark, copyright, etc,” He mumbled between laughter. Cisco started doing a victory dance, singing about the defeat of his 'hated enemy'.   
  
And that was when Caitlin cleared her throat.  
  
Both men looked up, Hartley still wheezing lightly and Cisco halfway through a pirouette. They immediately went bright red. Caitlin simply raised an eyebrow  
  
“Darth Vader,” She said in a rasping voice “Do you forget your master?”   
  
Cisco’s grin could cure cancer. Hartley lay back down on the desk, grumbling.   
  
They made her a lightsaber and Hartley now acted as Luke _and_ Obi-Wan, which made for some awkward moments when they got to Return of the Jedi.  
  
Barry walked in at some point, saw Caitlin, slouched and making odd hand motions and breathing sounds, Hartley acting as lightning and Cisco doing a dramatic guitar solo which was definitely ad-libbed with Darth Vader breathing and he turned and walked straight back out.  
  
How dare they not invite him?  
  
Barry could make actual _real_ lightning and oh now he saw why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review guys, I need validation like air.


	3. Rick I'm sorry.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'd just like to apologise for this. Or in which Hartley is a Villain™, Cisco isn't as innocent as he looks and Barry is unhelpful.

Revenge, Hartley had decided, was sweet.   
  
Of course the object of his torturous plots wasn’t nearly so impressed, but still, this wasn’t about him, this was about Hartley finally getting justice for the crimes done against him. Ramon was going to _suffer_ for everything he’d done, and Hartley _couldn’t wait_ for the pained screams. So he made plans, timed everything perfectly, nothing could go wrong. He calculated every possible move, every situation that could possibly occur, accounted for Barry Allen’s Anime Eyes For Justice™ and even for Caitlin Snow and Her Worryingly Good Darth Sidious Voice™.   
  
Then he went and made mac and cheese because being evil didn’t mean you didn’t get hungry. And Barry would kill him if he saw him shaking again.   
  
He ate the mac and cheese. He laughed evilly and practised his plan using his various pets as substitutes for Team Flash. Then he went to bed, you needed to be well rested for evil-doing, and it wasn’t at all to do with the fact that Caitlin checked his sleep cycle every week and she’d _murder_ him if she found out he wasn’t doing well again. Nothing at all to do with that.   
  
He was a _villain_.   
  
Villains didn’t _need_ people to look after them.  
  
The next morning he got up, fed the small army of animals he’d somehow collected and got dressed, smirking into the mirror before he left. Slowly he made his way to the Labs, ready for vengeance, of course once he arrived he postponed vengeance _just_ long enough for Barry to pass him a coffee and some cookies, because ‘Even villains need breakfast, Hart, it’s the most important meal of the day.’   
  
_Not_ that he listened to heroes.   
  
Villains and heroes being friends wasn’t even a thing.  
  
Then he restarted the Revenge program and sneaked off to find Ramon, Barry raising an eyebrow at the self made theme music (‘Let me live, Bear,’ ‘Whatever you say, Hart.’) as he left. He passed Caitlin and had to re-pause his plot to discuss makeup tips with her for five minutes- being an Evil-Doer™ would not stop him from contouring. Period.- before reinstating his priorities and sneaking off again.   
  
He found Ramon in their his lab, tinkering with his goggles and humming. Hartley didn’t laugh out loud, but cackled in his head, silently walking closer to his target, slowly letting an evil grin stretch across his face, ready for revenge. Ramon didn’t see anything until it was too late. Hartley watched as he suddenly stiffened, going dead still, just turning his head when Hartley enacted his plan.   
  
“ _Never gonna give you up,_ ” He sang. Ramon turned, eyes wide as Hartley paused, smirking with eyebrows raised  
  
“ _No_ ,” Ramon groaned as Hartley smiled  
  
“ _Never gonna let you down_ ,” He continued. Ramon shook his head  
  
“Please, _don’t,_ I _beg_ you,”   
  
“ _Never gonna run around,_ ” Hartley watched happily as Ramon clutched at his heart  
  
“Oh _god_ , what have I done?”  
  
“ _Or desert you,_ ” Hartley sang.   
  
“I’ve created a monster.” Cisco moaned, burying his face in his hands.   
  
“ _Never gonna say goodbye, never gonna make you cry,_ ” Hartley laughed as Cisco collapsed in on himself  
  
“I can’t take this! No more, _please_!” he begged.   
  
“ _Never gonna tell a lie, or hurt you,_ ”   
  
Hartley followed him around all day, singing the song without pause, humming it when Cisco finally duck taped his mouth. Eventually Hartley could be found sitting on Cisco’s desk, mumbling the lyrics through the tape which had slowly loosened, handcuffed in an attempt to deter him and stop him grabbing Cisco’s hoodie when he tried to escape (Silently Hartley thanked Caitlin, who had put Star Labs on lockdown, cackling at Cisco’s dismayed face) and staring at Cisco, who was now slowly banging his head against the desk.  
  
It went on for another five minutes.  
  
Finally, Cisco snapped.  
  
“Okay! I’m _sorry!_ I’m sorry for rick-rolling you, I’m sorry for locking you up, please, _please_ stop singing! I can’t stand it, _you win_.” He cried, hands over his ears. Hartley immediately shut up. Cisco blinked  
  
“Really, is that all it took? _Really?”_ He asked. Hartley shrugged, rolling his eyes. Cisco sat back in his chair “Huh. I like this, you, being quiet for once.”   
  
Hartley raised an eyebrow.  
  
“Maybe we should just keep you like this.” Cisco mumbled to himself, rubbing his chin. Hartley narrowed his eyes and started humming “It was a joke! I was joking! Geez, you’d think you’d be in favor.”   
  
Hartley’s other eyebrow joined the first on its trek to his hairline. Cisco smirked at him  
  
“All the comments about bondage, you’d think you’d enjoy being tied up.” He murmured, gesturing at the handcuffs. Hartley huffed and glanced pointedly down, Cisco nodded and removed the tape, ignoring Hartley’s small wince, the asshole deserved it  
  
“ _These_ ,” Hartley raised his shackled wrists “Are _very_ uncomfortable. No way in hell would I wear these, only leather or silk is okay.” He stated coolly. Cisco laughed   
  
“You’re so _fussy_ , you’re like a mean cat.” He giggled. Hartley frowned  
  
“Don’t be a dick, Cisco, I will start singing again.” He warned, “ _Anyways_ ,” Then he started Evilly Laughing, and Barry, who had been watching with popcorn, helpfully provided lightning, when Hartley ran out of breath he sent the speedster a thumbs up. “Thanks, Bear.”  
  
“No worries.” Barry replied, smirking at Cisco’s chagrined look. “On a lighter note, Hart, have you eaten this afternoon?”   
  
“Uh…..”  
  
“Guys we’re going to Subway.”   
  
Revenge was sweet, but feeling cared for was better.  
  
Villains didn’t need people to look after them, but _Hartley_ did. And he didn’t mind that at all.  
  
Villains and heroes being friends wasn’t even a thing, but Hartley and Team Flash being friends _was_.

And he loved it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review guys! Also, Rick, I'm so, so sorry.


	4. Doctors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hartley isn't healthy, Caitlin is becoming a daydrinker, Cisco is mysteriously absent and Barry continues to be Helpful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one isn't quite so fun as the others, but still quite fun.

Caitlin, who was aggressively clever, was not afraid to engage in a slappy fight with Barry and who could hold her own against pretty much any Meta with the power of Snark™ alone, was a _total_ _nightmare_ , Hartley realised. She had employed herself as their doctor. That didn’t mean very good things for her. Now for Barry and Cisco, who only had to be dragged away from their projects maybe once or twice every two weeks, it was fine. But for Hartley, who had learnt early on to ignore his body in favour of his mind (‘Dad I’m so tired, please can-‘ ‘Don’t even ask, boy, a Rathaway gets all A’s. You’ll study until I say stop’ He _never_ said stop.) it was just a little bit harder to deal with.   
  
Especially since Caitlin was _obviously_ a She-Witch.   
  
It had all started when Barry noticed Hartley shaking through a hasty explanation of how to defeat a particularly annoying meta. The hero had frowned, looked closer, then shot out and grabbed Hartley’s hand, ignoring the small squeak and quick complaint. He frowned at how the hand didn’t stop shaking in his grip.   
  
“Caitlin, I gotta run, give Hart a medical, will you?” He asked, before zipping off to deal with the latest Superpowered Toddler™. Caitlin slowly turned to face Hartley, who raised an eyebrow  
  
“Caitlin, surely this isn’t necessary.” Hartley Didn’t Plead™. Caitlin tilted her head and brandished a thermometer.   
  
Definitely a She-Witch.   
  
Barry returned with a de-powered meta grumbling into his beard to see what looked like an intervention.   
  
Uh oh.  
  
He walked over, tugging along the meta, who really hadn’t been all that big of a deal, raising an eyebrow at the conversation.  
  
“Hartley, I swear to God if you don’t- Barry! Tell this moron-‘  
  
“Hey!” Hartley protested   
  
“-Tell this _moron_ ,’ Caitlin continued “That he needs to eat and sleep every day and that doing otherwise is _not healthy_.”   
  
“Barry, tell Caitlin that I am _perfectly fine_ , and that I don’t need any more food or sleep.” Hartley clenched his jaw as he watched the cogs turn in Barry’s head.   
  
“Dude, you do need to do what she says, can’t do anything without sleep and food.” The meta piped up. Hartley blinked  
  
“Who asked you?” He mumbled, before turning expectantly to Barry who was trying not to giggle  
  
“Listen man, before I was a meta, I was a doctor, and I see far too many of your type, not sleeping, not eating right, you think your mind can keep up with that? You’re dead wrong. You’re brains gonna start shutting down and- Do you pass out a lot?” The meta argued. Barry raised an eyebrow as Hartley went pink  
  
“…Yes.” He mumbled. Caitlin scoffed and threw her hands in the air, walking off to find some alcohol. She was _far_ too sober to deal with this right now.   
  
“Then dude you’re in deep shit, I mean-” Barry tugged on his collar  
  
“Thats enough out of you. Hart, you stay right there.” He stated, before scooping up the chatty meta and running down to the pipeline, returning an instant later with a Not Best Pleased™ look.  
  
‘Hart, why didn’t you tell us you’re passing out?” He asked coolly. Hartley flinched  
  
“It’s not even a thing, I just black out sometimes, or get dizzy,” He mumbled. Barry raised an eyebrow  
  
“How often?”  
  
“Passing out? Not that regularly, maybe once every month, but thats only when I’m not careful or get clumsy with my aids.” He rushed out “I get dizzy a lot though.”   
  
Barry ran a hand through his hair “Right. You’re gonna do exactly what Caitlin says, when she says it. Hartley, _why_ don’t you-”  
  
“My dad didn’t like it when I slept instead of studying, I catnapped my way through the bit of high school I wasn’t disowned for.”  
  
“And the eating?”  
  
“I…uh…”   
  
“When exactly were you disowned?”  
  
“I was…fifteen, maybe?” Hartley flinched as Barry growled, jaw clenching “It wasn’t a big deal, I sealed all my accounts and bought a cheap flat, it wasn’t much but it was mine, but, money was always tight so I never had enough for food and I usually had to spread everything over a few weeks when I could go shopping, so I guess I never broke the habit.”   
  
Barry blinked. “Oh, Hartley, I’m so sorry.” He murmured. Hartley shrugged  
  
“Wasn’t a big deal,” He replied softly.   
  
“You moron, _yes it is_ , of course it's a big deal. Come here.” Barry ordered. Hartley hesitantly stepped closer only to be enfolded in a bear hug, squeaking as Barry held him close “There are a few habits, Hart, that are hard to break but you feel _so_ much better when you do.” 

Of course when Cisco returned from removing Dante's head from his ass (again) he was filled in and promptly spent an hour plying Hartley with any and all food he could find in the lab, and was only stopped when Caitlin stated that giving her patient a sugar rush would only worsen the shakiness. Cisco's face had made Barry laugh for ten minutes straight.

  
And that was how Team Flash began aggressively monitoring their pet scientists health.  
  
And if Hartley occasionally paid a visit to a doctor who’s name wasn’t Caitlin and who had a penchant for stealing equipment in a superpowered manner, then that was _his_ business.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always y'all, please review. Also, this one was super fun to write, hope you enjoyed

**Author's Note:**

> After watching the latest flash ep (MY SON HOLY SHIT I WASNT READY) I decided to write a bunch of things to fill in the gaps while we finish the endless wait for me to post Siren Song’s sequel (its coming I swear, also siren song will continue as Season two did, including the going back because Barry knows not to fuck around with hart this time)


End file.
